Through Redeemed Eyes - Entries from February 2011

I would like to think that this song doesn’t apply to me.  I always try to go out of my way to be as non-judgmental as possible…at church. I never look down on anyone who has made decisions in the past that may have been regrettable…at church.  The problem lies in those two words—at church. Away from church is a different story.

I’m not sure where the mind goes for me when church is over and I go home.  Now, I don’t struggle with everything.  I still work to be a “good person.”  I generally act the same way that I do on Sunday morning.  But one of the things I know that I struggle with is the judgment of others when it comes to past decisions.  This applies mostly to some members of my own family. Even when there may be some effort to right past mistakes, I get that distinct holier-than-thou feeling that we all sometimes experience. 

So, I know that this song is about judgment at church, which can of course be a problem at many churches, however I feel that this could be taken a little further.  You see, we are not called to just be at church on Sunday morning, we are called to be The Church, all the time, and everywhere. And, even though, most of the people that we encounter in our day-to-day lives will not be under our steeple, we should most certainly extend the same courtesy as though they were.  If I recall correctly, the woman at the well was not someone who was expecting anything except for condemnation when Jesus approached her.  And while we can’t offer the same forgiveness that Jesus could, we could at least make sure we don’t completely ruin the idea of that forgiveness by judging the people who need it (and we all need it).  I must make sure that I take the ideas and the mindset that I have on Sunday morning home with me, just in case I run into a woman at the well…or anyone else, for that matter.

Thad Bergstrom

During those times when I have to spend long hours working on the computer, I will often listen to music in the background as a distraction from the sound of the keyboard tapping.  However, when I first heard the song Break Even by the Script, I had to stop.  The lyrics and hearing the artist having to sing them made my heart hurt.  This is not a metaphor…I physically felt pain for whoever went through the experiences detailed in this song. 

As I hear the song again and again, I think that this pain stems from the author’s feeling of despair:

-          I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

-          What am I supposed to do?

-          I’m falling to pieces…

The lyrics make it very clear that this despair is a direct result from a broken relationship.  What is less clear are the reasons why behind the break.  We do not know if this is a relationship that should have been repaired or if it was best to be replaced as described in the song (exactly what Lee is talking about this Sunday).  What we do know is that when relationships are not healthy then there are consequences (a heart breaking) and hurt.

What is even scarier to me is not only this feeling of hurt and despair (just utter brokenness), but that the author has no hope to be able to get through it at all.  As a follower of Jesus Christ, I understand that when my heart breaks (I experience a trial), I ultimately place my hope in the fact that a loving Father (God) will provide me with perseverance, character, and faith to know that I am not helpless and I can be reconciled (first and foremost to Him) - Romans 5:3-11.  The author, in a desperate attempt to regain some form of hope, in his inherent desire to be complete again, even knows to pray to God (although he does not believe in Him).    

I think that there is a desire in all of us to be reconciled…reconciled to each other and to God.  And here is the thing…God wants to be reconciled to us!  Just like Paul lays out for us in Romans 5:11, we have the opportunity to ‘exult in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation.’  Jesus has provided us with the pattern for reconciliation and how to love and care for all those involved (just like Lee is teaching us through this entire series). 

I often think of what I would say to the writer going through this situation.  But this is what I have to remember, no matter how matter how truthful and ‘wise’ I know Paul’s words to be in Romans they are not going to stop the bleeding and pain that the writer feels.  He is grieving…hard…immeasurably hard.  As a follower of Christ, what am I supposed to do…what I am supposed to say?!?!?! 

It is hard when we find ourselves so deep into something that we know we shouldn’t be involved in.  Sometimes it’s easier just to keep going in the same direction, making the same mistakes and following the same behavioral patterns.  It is comfortable staying where you think it’s normal.

In order for our “normal” to be changed we must first change our habits and recognize the sin that is holding us back.  And for that to happen, our perception of reality must be redefined.

As followers we are called by Jesus to “Seek First His Kingdom and His Righteousness, and then He promises we will have all we need.” (Matthew 6:33)

However, it is also true that our willpower is limited.  Our intentions are good, but our follow through doesn’t always come through.

For me, I found comfort in the song Sober, by Kelly Clarkson. 

One part of the song that I love is:

Three months and I’m still breathing

Been a long road since those hands I left my tears in

But I know it’s never really over

We all struggle with something or someone and I find that this song is a great reminder that we take things one day at a time.  And we take delight in the small milestones that we come across. And as Followers of Christ we have one more thing to delight in during the hard times and relapses, God wants us to lean on Him and find refuge in Him.  In Hebrews 13:5 God promises to never leave us nor to forsake us. 

Here’s a quote that I love: Having issues isn’t the absence of victory in our lives.  It’s simply reminding us victory is right around the corner.